We Weren’t Taught How to Feel

In many homes, schools, or systems, emotional education simply didn’t exist. There was no safe way to ask, “What is this I’m feeling?”—and no roadmap for how to sit with the discomfort that emotions can bring.

Instead, we absorbed other messages:

• That fear is something to push through, not honour.

• That anger is unacceptable, rather than a signal something feels unsafe or unfair.

• That sadness makes us weak or burdensome, instead of human.

So we found ways to survive.

Survival Isn’t a Flaw

We adapted in the only ways we knew how.

Some of us stayed quiet.
Others learned to speak louder.
Some held everything in.
Others had to let it all out.
Some tried to control every detail.
Others let everything go.

None of these were failures.
They were deeply human ways of responding to environments where emotional safety was missing.

Now There’s Space to Try Something New

With awareness and compassion, we can begin to shift our relationship with emotions—from something we manage or avoid, to something we acknowledge and honour.

It might look like:

• Pausing when frustration arises and asking, “What feels unfair here?”

• Noticing tears and allowing them, instead of apologising.

• Giving ourselves permission to feel without immediately fixing, explaining, or justifying.

Healing isn’t about getting it right. It’s about creating space to feel—gently, one moment at a time.

You’re Not Behind

If emotional literacy feels new to you, that’s not a failure.
It means you're learning a language you were never taught.

And learning takes time.
It takes safety.
It takes compassion.